Putting Success and Failure in Perspective

I love success...and winning.

Failing or losing never feels good.  

But what is success and failure?

I could consider myself a success by my ability to play a Level 5 book with ease.  However, I know my capability is beyond Level 5; setting a goal below my competency - is that a picture of success?

Not by a long shot.

Success

Success is aiming for a goal that is just out of reach but not out of sight (learning to play the original piano composition of Rhapsody in Blue).  I see what I am aiming to accomplish, and by stretching, practicing and honing my skills I will someday achieve it.  That is the success mindset.  

The act of setting and reaching low level goals is not a good measure of success.  It is the stretching and achieving that adds self-esteem and the thrill of victory.

Failure

A good look at failure reveals this:

We need more practice

We need better defined goals

We need more information

We need to slow down

We need to grow in incremental steps

Just because a student has failed at something does not mean she/he is a failure.  This is perhaps the most important principle of this blog.  

My husband, Michael, is fond of saying:  

“Failure Is not Final”

Your child’s failures can lead to success when gently nurtured along with a healthy dose of reality... “Okay you failed.  What do you need to do differently next time?  What can you learn from this momentary setback?”

The fixed mindset says:  

“Success means smart.”

“Failure means dumb.”

I hope you will consider this:

Success is incremental.

Failure is a learning opportunity.

Carolyn Biggs

Steps and Skips

Tips for the Developing Student